Here are some tips when it comes to establishing trust and clear communication between you and your lover or tantra partner. Whether you choose to address your loving partner or you decide to contact a tantra surrogate you need to realize all humans thrive with compliments, gentle and persuasive tone of voice and your ability to sound loving and non threatening.
While some people may find it convenient to “text” their partner or future healer I find it socially unacceptable and not as respectful or loving as a simple direct phone call.
Texts have a lot to be desired and soothing sounds like your caring voice is missing when you shoot a quick text. There is a lack of feeling and a lack of etiquette if you send a text as a convenience. I personally find it less compelling than a direct phone call and may respond with a lack of sensitivity since text messages are meaningless. I don’t feel respected for the work I do when someone can’t set aside a simple five minutes to call me directly and let me know they have a strong interest and desire to learn tantra.
If you only have a quick five minutes in your time frame use those five minutes and make direct and loving contact with your partner to let them know how important they are and that when you have more free time you would like to get together or at least chat. When you give people choices you show them you care and you respect and value their time. Shooting a quick text and saying I miss you is a lot less meaningful than simply ringing up someone directly and whispering I MISS YOU!
We now think it is polite to send text messages to tantra practitioners but it’s the reverse of polite it’s showing your tantra healer that you are so busy you aren’t that serious about really tuning into their energy and you lack a heart connection and lack the desire for intimacy. The quickest way to turn off your tantra healer is by sending then a text message in the middle of the night and asking them if they are available. Are you that lazy that dialing a number is out of the question? Are you serious about wanting a session because in my eyes my feeling is you are only lukewarm about wanting a healing because you sent a text message and were non committal.
The quickest way to kill intimacy is to nit pick to your partner and tell them everything that is wrong about their hair, their style of dress and the way they look in general. If you want the best to come out of your love relationship find things that make you happy and find out what makes your partner proud. If your partner is very meticulous about color and design emphasize their positive qualities first then you might wish to address their odd habits in the future but NOT during a romantic moment not unless you wish to distance yourself from them.
If you want to bring out the best in your tantra healer again go over their general appearance with loving eyes and simply accept them for who they are. When you can love your tantra partner unconditionally and without any sense of judgement you will be surprised at how they will “shine” for you. If you can make genuine eye contact with your tantra goddess and you can smile with approval in your eyes that brings out the Goddess qualities out that will enhance your shared time together. If on the other hand the first few words that come out of your mouth are words of criticism and your face shows any traces of displeasure that certainly won’t make your partner confident she will simply feel distanced from you and may even not wish to share her true loving nature with you because she can’t feel your heart energy and does not feel safe enough to expose her heart energy with you.
You gain nothing by being harsh or critical to your teacher or your beloved. If you expect to be healed and or taken seriously call your partner directly. Use words that are soothing to the ear and be your most perfect paternal self. Be protective of the Goddess and show her your divine masculine. Show her your patience and your willingness to meet her in the middle when you change plans or change your mind.
When you beam out pure love your goddess will feel safe and honored enough to be childlike and adorable. If you can stare into your Beloved’s eyes and just see her divine essence you will begin to feel this gratifying energy that starts from your heart chakra and connects with her heart chakra. This type of connective synergy is what weaves you closer instead of further apart.